We are all striving to be normal but really we can only be next to normal

If for some reason you are in New York, see this musical, it is life changing. The musical portrays real family issues through a more contemporary, rock music selection. It is so amazing that my boyfriend was getting teary eyed during it.

The theme of love in like most plays and musicals is prominent, but especially in Next to Normal it showed the work needed behind most relationships in order for love to be successful. The show presented the hardships and the highs of a relationship, but seriously made me personally reflect on my own relationship. I love my boyfriend with my whole heart, and the one line in the musical hit me to the core, “I am the one who loves, I am the one who cares, I am the one who won’t walk away”. Literally, I was bawling inside.

Sorry very random topic, but from a musical fanatic I give it 10 thumbs up J

Happiness is...

Sorry I haven't written in a while, it seems that my whole world is collasping and noone is there to hold my hand. So im going for a more personal look to my blog, i dont know it was a last minute idea. So...

Do you ever feel empty inside, as if nothing ever makes you satisfied or happy? If someone told me to write down what makes me happy, I would not know what to write. Every day I hope that I can find this driving force or topic that will lead me to my happiness, but I haven’t found it yet. As frustrating as it is at times, there is a small speck of hope in the future. Someone once told me to follow him and he will lead me to happiness, and I have seen that this person has a pure happiness with himself and with his life. I do not feel that anymore. I used to when I was younger like the saying is ignorance is bliss, and it is the truth. However, one cannot be ignorant after learning of so much heartache, violence, and disappointment is in the world and that the future holds. I am striving everyday to attain happiness, but I’m slowly losing hope.

I have love, I found seriously the first person in my life that I live everyday for, and want to spend every waking minute with, but they will be gone for whole year next year. He is the closest thing in my life to what happiness is, and now it will be overseas, nowhere close to me. I feel like no matter what I do I can never succeed. He is the only thing currently that is going right, so what happens next?